1. |
Out Of Frame
04:17
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in my room, silent two
someone move the needle
summer off, paint the wall
grieve in lavender
i always meant it more than you did
i took it slow while you kept moving
out of frame
desk job blues, eat the news
pour a drink or three
first time i'd like to die
give it half a try
take half a pill and dig a small hole
curl up inside an old piano
fail again to make two halves align
point a timid hand toward the light
i never meant it more than you did
just couldn't stand to watch you blooming
out of frame
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2. |
How The Old Ones Go
03:56
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waking up in the early morning
it doesn't take much to get things moving
my coffee cup could never keep up with the times
i was a genius in my mind
could never get the pen to notice
now the ink's all run dry
my hands are tied
i'm only one step down a long road
repeat new mantras until i forget how the old ones go
i drew a long, hard line
and i built a big bridge
between what it was back then and what it is
at least what it could have been
waking up in the early morning
making lists and trying hard to stay grounded and present
it's such a simple thing to notice, so i try
there's pink clouds in the sky
sunrise filling in the treeline
neglected car alarm sighs
my hands are tied
i'm only one step down a long road
repeat new mantras until i forget how the old ones go
my hands are tied
i'm only one step down a long road
keep singing this song until i forget how my old songs go
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3. |
Room To Grow
03:13
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pour myself a cup of coffee, feel the wind blow
ash right out the window
I think they like me here
but I don’t know if there's much room to grow
breathe in twice, ash out the window
sometimes we sleep with knives
I put a shirt over my eyes to keep the light out
drink a bottle every night to keep the light out
keep the party going fine until it's lights out
on a tuesday in the rain unpacked my bags alone
on a tuesday watched the rain seep in across the crooked kitchen floor
but I think they like me here
so I wrote a simple song
cause I've been learning how to use less words
though I found strength in the numbers
I found strength in the numbers
(strength in the numbers)
til I found strength in another
for every blacked out night
kept the curtains drawn tight til it was light out
could be better, but I'm doing fine for right now
though I'll be with you if you think the end's in sight now
I'll be with you if you think the end's in sight now
there's an end in sight now
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4. |
Thawing Technicolor
04:21
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thawing technicolor
city springtime corner store
letting out the laundry
racing shadows down the shore
while you wait in my apartment
silhouette framed in the door
I've been looking for a reason
I don't gotta look no more
to stop waiting on you
always waiting on you
to stop waiting on you
always waiting on you
"there's no safety on the outskirts
there's no comfort in the search
you must open up the notebook
do your life-affirming work"
or just let one hand trace the margin
while the other palms the stone
I could squeeze it till it bleeds
it still won't tell me what I'm owed
I can't worry bout that
always worried bout that
I can't worry bout that
always worried bout that
I've been smart I've been trite
growing girls need to write
I've been strong I've been slight
I go dark I go light
I lived wrong I got right
now I sleep through the night
used to sit up and cry in the kitchen
I've been smart I've been trite
growing girls need to write
I've been strong I've been slight
I go dark I go light
I lived wrong I got right
now I sleep through the night
used to sit and get high in the kitchen
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5. |
Cut Out The Rot
03:36
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endless, the days
circling ruts in your own doubt
there's only one room
that ever gets warm in the whole house
unfocus your eyes
let them glaze white
play the tape out
listless and dazed
kicking up dust down a long road
don't know if it works
but the work is the only thing you know
may it someday come as easy as breath:
in and out and in again
secretly high
and desperate to keep your composure
crying at work
it takes all you got to be sober
you'll get older present or not
so cut out the rot and start over
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6. |
Make It Bad (voice memo)
03:21
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pace around the kitchen in threadbare socks
a sink full of dishes, a head full of rocks
there's nothing in this house that'll set me free
I sink into a chair, try and let it be alright
if it's not clever then it's not worth saying
if I'm never gonna win, is it even worth playing?
it's the middle of the night and I'm wound a little tight
so I spend a bit of time by the oceanside, alright
we gotta make it bad before it gets better
gotta sit in the storm, the storm'll get wetter
if it isn't now then it might be never
that we make it bad so it can get better
first light comes around five these days
with any luck I'm already awake
strong cup of coffee in the firelight
a book I won't read, a song I might write
and if it isn't now then it might be never
gotta write this down before we both forget it
we gotta make it bad before it gets better
gotta sit in the storm, the storm'll get wetter
if it isn't now then it might be never
that we make it bad so it can get better
if it's not clever then it's not worth saying
if I'm never gonna win, is it even worth playing?
second cup of coffee cause I can't get stoned
a book I didn't read and this song that I just wrote
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7. |
Fragments
03:56
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day one, I'm all fragments
adrift beneath a canopy of pine
alone, awake and scattered
unsure of what I've been sent here to find
pray the hit lands clean
I've been blowing off some steam
boxing shadows in the moonlight on the lake
the truth will move through me
like it moves through everything
in the stillness I can feel it taking shape
long gone that ceaseless creaking
of ancient worry twisting up my spine
no time, no before or after
no made-up monsters loitering in my mind
fight the midday sun
coming blissfully undone
your fear is but a shadow on your face
the truth will move through you
like it always seems to do
mirrored fragments on the surface of the lake
pray the hit lands clean
I've been blowing off some steam
boxing shadows in the moonlight on the lake
the truth will move through me
like it moves through everything
in the stillness I can feel it taking shape
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8. |
Lighten
04:26
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sat outside the wedding working out some chords
while everyone got dressed
running down the checklist: shoes are shined and tied
and collared shirts are pressed
murmured voices buzzing brightly
calm my own noise, help unwind me
I let the light in
earlier, in jersey, stuck in traffic
with a coffee in my lap
high noon summer heatwave
ripples air across the billowing expanse
absent music, I enter daydream
and feel the static burst inside me
and then it happens,
I feel it happen:
I let the light in
I watch a year die and I forgive me
you left your body, exist more freely
I wasn't frightened thought it was heavy
the weight we shared then has all but left me
I felt it lighten
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9. |
Summer In Still Life
03:10
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rose-fingered dawn comes soft and slow
greet me to life, get up and go
bright with the morning
here for the show
tea kettle sings a spiraling pour
let's drag the mattress out to the porch
languish out loud
the good kind of sore
wildfire smoke hangs on the lake
curtains on glass, billowing shapes
a broken projector
lurching freeze frames
pine needles press hard on your thigh
when you rise from the yard to meet me inside
pears in a bowl
cool kitchen tile
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Juniper Ginger Portland, Maine
Juniper Ginger is the solo project of Portland, Maine songwriter Alex Millan.
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